Turning Around Performance

You can’t turn around team performance sitting in meetings. To change outcomes on the team: Be with them. Meet with them. Share feedback with them. Teach them how to win. Stop talking TO and AT them. Start sharing their own strengths and opportunities with them. Coach them how to be better… ‘them’, not just better…

Managers & Overwhelm

Every manager I talk with these days is overwhelmed. It is the most common feeling I hear about. Too much work. Too little resources. Too little time. Feeling overwhelm for most of us shuts us down. This feeling actually makes us less productive. In the very moment when we say we want to be more…

Arguing is a Tease…

You think you can make your employees understand. You think when they push back, you should too. You think you can win. And prove it. And … be ‘right’. What if none of that was necessary? It’s tempting to be drawn into an argument. To get them to agree with you. So we can all…

Performance is NOT an Opinion

The most valuable practice you can develop as a leader, when dealing with difficult employees, is to focus on facts, not opinions. Notice what they DO or DON’T do, rather than the labels (lazy, rude, argumentative, know-it-all, etc.) you assign for their behavior. Practice today just noticing WHAT you observe rather than thinking you know…

What Our Poor Performers Teach Us

Oh…. Wouldn’t it be nice if everyone was just a rockstar and achieved all their goals? Wouldn’t it be nice if we didn’t actually have to coach or develop or address performance gaps? But, alas, this is the role of a leader. To build performance, not inherit it. When a player doesn’t perform we have…

Justification

We often think we have to justify our anger or frustration. We think we need other people to know WHY we feel the way we do. Which of course means we want them to know how they or someone else caused our pain. And how they need to change to make us feel better. But…

Difficult People are Our Emotional Tough Mudder

Every weekend people participate in marathons, mud runs, cycle races, and other physical challenges. They train for months, sometimes years, to be ready for the challenge. Most motivational messages about success and goals use visual images of people doing challenging sports and activities. When we reference overcoming fear and difficulty and pain, we focus on…

Join Me at The Beach?

 Every year, I offer an intimate, exclusive coaching intensive on-the-beach for the women in my community. It’s call ‘She is Relentless’. To say the work we do together is powerful; while sitting on the beach, under the pines, on the nature preserve that surrounds the Turtle Bay Resort, is such an understatement. Some have gone so…

Do You Believe in Yourself?

Things happen everyday that we cannot control. We believe that many of those things rattle us. I learned some time ago that it isn’t the circumstance that creates our experience. It is our thinking about the circumstance that designs the experience we have with it. I see this in my clients day-after-day. My employee doesn’t…

Uber.

Uber is a hot mess. And the CEO is the crux of the problems. The good news is, he released a statement indicating he wants a leadership coach. Awesome. The best news will be if he takes willful action and changes his behavior. THAT remains to be seen. Here’s what Uber and its CEO are…

How to NOT Argue with Your Employees

Too many managers accept invitations to argue with their staff. Debating is different that arguing. Arguing is simply defending your point of view. When we argue we don’t listen. When we argue, we aren’t supervising our emotions. When we stop supervising our emotions, we run the risk of making significant mistakes as leaders AND impairing our…

A Video Blog

Hi Kris, This week I thought I’d share a video blog for a change! I’m working on videos for my upcoming “The Core for Leaders” membership program and figured I’d try out a few video blogs as well… Would love your thoughts! And please feel free to share with your teammates and colleagues! A quick…

Here’s an Idea: Setting Expectations

My upcoming podcast is about Setting Expectations, so I thought I’d offer some included and additional highlights here. There are many valuable reasons WHY leaders should set clear expectations with team members. Clearly set AND COMMUNICATED expectations allow for: Less confusion on the team More engagement Better communication Stronger culture of accountability Higher performance Stronger…

Here’s an Idea: Entitlement

  Entitled.   I hear it weekly.   “They are so entitled.” “They believe they are entitled to… “ “They act so entitled.” “They are just a bunch of entitled (#@$^).”   Individual leaders use this label all-too-frequently and it may just be having a dramatic impact on their team(s).   A common definition of…

The Perfection Response

Perfection stifles growth. If perfection could speak it would say: “Don’t do it wrong” “Don’t embarrass yourself” “Everyone will know if you make a mistake” “We cannot make errors” “Our mistakes define us” “There is a right way and a wrong way to do this and you aren’t doing it right”   As long as…

Manager Coaching

As a part of our ongoing discussion about key strategies for successful managers, I’d like to chat about Manager Coaching: I know. You hear about it all the time. Coach your people. Are you coaching? How well do you coach your team? You know, you really do need to coach more…. So what the heck…

Measuring Performance

  Every position in your organization exists to do something for the organization. Therefore, every role in your organization should have measures to evaluate its contribution to the organization. Please note, I’m referring to ROLES or POSITIONS not individuals or people. Individual performance will be discussed in the next installment about Coaching. Things to think…

Motivation and Engagement

  If there’s a buzz word today, its ‘engagement’. Gallup’s work here is pretty tremendous and pretty astounding. Less than 30% of our work force is actually engaged. What-the-heck? How do we fix it? Here’s what won’t fix it: Jeans on Friday A Keurig in the break room Certificates or ‘rocks’ to celebrate awesomeness What…

Leaders with Imposter Syndrome

I’ve worked with a lot of leaders lately who share a common thought. They believe they haven’t really earned their role. Or they believe that they really don’t know what they’re doing and eventually someone will find them out. They compare themselves to other people in similar roles or who have similar titles and they…

Leading Teams through Change

Change happens every day. Our work is not static. We have to stop believing that things should stay the same. We have to stop expecting things to be consistent. A vital role as leaders today, is to move our teams, effectively through change. When we join our team in commiserating, complaining and moaning about change; we aren’t leading. It…

What Breaks Your Heart?

I watched this quick video last week and found it incredibly powerful. Asking this question can help direct our energy (for ourselves and our organization). Understanding THAT thing that breaks your heart, knowing your compelling reason to do what you do… it’s the secret sauce. I thought about it. What breaks my heart? Knowing that…

Managing and People Pleasing

I cannot count the amount of times I’ve heard a manager tell me they’re a ‘people pleaser’. As a result, they find it difficult to: Say “no” Have conversations with others about performance Delegate Ask others to do work they know they could just do themselves (see delegate) Give bad news Change their mind Write-up…

Stop It

Stop it. Stop waiting for other people to make decisions before you decide your own future. Example: “I need to wait and see if I’m going to get that promotion and then I’ll decide what to do.” Decide: do you want the promotion? If so, why? What will the promotion in this company bring you…

Dear Leadership…

Dear Leadership, I’m hoping we can just chat for a minute. I can tell you’re terribly confused and I don’t blame you. It’s been a tough go these past few… well… centuries. We’ve done our best to confuse you, haven’t we Leadership? We’ve wanted you to be so many things. We’ve wanted you to be…

Leading yourSELF

I listened to this podcast yesterday during two car trips. All I can say is that it is excellent. The host, Joe Polish and the guest author Adam Markel fill the podcast with incredible insights on Leading yourSELF. Markel recently published a book, Pivot: The Art and Science of Reinventing Your Career and Life, and…

Influencing Up, Down and Sideways

I’m leading a workshop tomorrow on “Influencing Up”. In preparation for the workshop I read The Art of People, by Dave Kerpen. It’s an excellent read on some powerful key, simple insights to help us make better connections with one another. As a Coach, my job is to observe and understand my clients, not through…

How Much Deep Work Are You Doing?

I’ve been attracted to an awesome book called Deep Work, by Cal Newport. In a world where we are called upon to have multiple tasks, conversations and decisions occupying our mind at once, our ability to connect to deep work is becoming increasingly rare. But the need for us to really connect to deep work…

Your WHY is Steering Your HOW

Why did you sign up to be a manager? Was it for the promotion? The salary? The increased responsibility? Maybe it’s because it’s the next natural step to a longer term goal. Maybe it’s so you can have a broader impact and give back. All-too-often we don’t really know WHY we want to be managers.…

Empathy Not Information

This video is so incredibly powerful. It’s short and yes, you do have to subscribe to watch it… but do it. Hank Fortener delivers incredibly powerful insight about how to deal with difficult people. He attributes his biggest failures to his avoidance of difficult conversations. And my favorite quote: “Nobody changes their mind about you…

Wishing Things Were Different

I recently purchased Michael Singer’s book, The Surrender Experiment. While I can’t attest to the entire book (as I haven’t read it all yet), I can say that one of the opening paragraphs really resonated and echoes so much of what I talk about with my clients who are dealing with difficult. He writes: “Every day,…

Procrastination

Today . . . I’m sharing thoughts and resources about procrastination. How appropriate that this video by Tim Urban should appear in my FB newsfeed – Inside the mind of a master procrastinator! Watch it. It’s amazing and funny and will likely connect with you, in some way. I’ve been reflecting on my own procrastination. He…

How to Coach Anyone on Anything

As most of us are already aware, adults often have a difficult time making significant behavior changes. That’s why so many of us stay stuck in negative behavior patterns. It’s not so much that we don’t want to change – it’s more that we don’t understand how to go through that change. The way it…

What if Difficult Didn’t Exist?

What if it were really true? What if difficult doesn’t exist? I taught a “How to Coach Difficult People” course for managers this week. Each manager came with their example(s) of how employees are difficult. They gossip They interrupt They are disrespectful They are rude They don’t do their work They come to work late…

Think About This: No Matter What.

I’ve just returned from a powerful, long weekend retreat in Santa Barbara. Once a year, the certified coaches from The Life Coach School meet to mastermind and learn from wicked smart teachers and one another. This weekend was no exception. It was a truly moving experience. The snippets of knowledge are too vast to share.…

Think About This: Expectations

Recent events in my personal life have, once again, reminded me of the importance of clearly established expectations… Especially if you are in a leadership role. We are all culprits of not setting clear expectations from time-to-time. It’s inevitable. BUT if you lead others, your clarity and communication regarding your expectations is vital. When we aren’t clear,…

Think About This: Change

Lately, I’ve been working with quite a few clients on dealing with, managing, going through various types of change. One thing that strikes me as so interesting is how surprised we are (as humans) when we encounter change.  It’s fascinating, right? Everything is always changing and yet, when we encounter change we act surprised. As if…

Why Managers’ Feelings Matter

Despite our best efforts to prove otherwise We all share one thing in common at work. We’re all human. As humans, we have feelings. Now, we don’t make a practice of talking about feeeeleings At work If you do you may be considered emotional, weak or soft. So, we’ve created a work culture that doesn’t…

Figuring Out What’s Next

If I’ve heard one common comment from friends and colleagues over the past year it’s been  “I’m figuring out what’s next”… Although that seems like such a benign little comment, it isn’t. For many of us, figuring out what’s next has meant so much more: It’s meant losing something we thought we’d keep forever. It…

Is There a Right Leadership Style?

Written by Chad Bandy chad.bandy@ymail.com The workplace today demands different styles and personalities for vastly different leadership challenges.   Transformational leaders are needed to take a team or company in a new direction all the while attempting to survive the turmoil and controversy they create to make change happen.  Transitional leaders can be short-term; knowing they…